Sleepless Nights Of An Over-Thinker

Random thoughts please go away my body and mind needs peaceful sleep.

I was four years old swimming in the creek with my sister, to sitting in front of my doctor telling the most messed up day of my life of getting kidnapped, in hopes of getting help to stop this nonstop chaos within my mind.

Wait, there was more than one day to tell about. Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, family? family sucks, she said what, what a low life maybe I shouldn’t have said all that, naaa who cares run with it. (This post isn’t about you move on I’m rambling) Paris, stop thinking about Paris or you’ll cry.

This world is gonna explode. Pray.  You gave up on praying, what’s the use? good people die horrible deaths such as cancer and other crazy things, Jason’s mamaw and papaw both were amazing people, they died and for what. Religion?? let’s not go there. I’ve give up in that area of life.

Paris truck driver pointlessly killed so many. All those families lost so much. OMGosh… I have this guy in my head running around at 4:30 am trying to find the main power switch to shut down my mind for the night with no luck. Keep rambling nonsense through your head. Don’t fall asleep, baby gonna wake up soon for her feeding. You can’t sleep. The dog or cat gonna causing a racket, wait till they start then stop again maybe sleep then sleep. Nope fooled ya. Oh crap, she gonna wake up soon.

You gotta go to the grocery with no sleep with a 3yr old and a baby. Good luck with that. Eyes burning.  Well, close em. Foster care,?? yep you did that. Let’s see the last two were wild little children. Sat In front of a board to remove them, Social Services lied to take them. Talk to the  guy that has information about fixing the case, nope don’t get involved. He won’t tell the truth.

Real bad night at Grayson manor, tried to get a restraining order. Haha naaa get kidnapped 3 days later. Debbie was there at work. Debbie was pretty cool Ol lady. Maw is what I called her. Wonder if she ever thinks back of that night.

Yep your still rambling. Well, you wasted a whole night of thinking that got you nowhere. Eeny, meeny, miny, turn yourself around. Paris. Nope don’t cry. Geez that’s 3 trains went by.. Cat’s meowing at the door. Wow he’s  loud. This is what it’s like to have a sleeping disorder. Wait I’m not done yet. Sleep?? Sleep??

Your gonna wish you had it but not gonna happen today, yep it’s already another day gone by. It’s almost 6 am. Sure am glad I always tell my kids I love them and they  know I do. Turn toss and turn some more. Wow if you are reading all this you are dedicated because it makes no sense.

If you are being forced to toss one of your kids in a shark tank which would you pick first? Yep, I thought it. (our minds ramble nonsense) Don’t know why but it happened. Wait, I forgot a part talking to the doctor about guns and people on medications.Yes, I carry a gun to protect my kids and myself and if need be you and whoever is in seeing distance

Pills vs pot. Not for pills but pot puts you in jail, what BS. Yep, you had to stop. It helped with this freaking issue right here. It shuts up a rumbling brain at night so you can sleep but oh well take a pill oh wait you can’t you have a baby in the house. No sleep for you.

Back to the shark tank. Toss one. Yep made that choice. The 9 yr old then the oldest then wait throw yourself in. Then how will you know what happened to them? Crap backtrack. Moving on. She is gonna wake up. Nope husband will first. Sucks not having a shut-off switch like a lot of people. Why is the TV making that noise? I’m so exhausted. Try to close your eyes.

Oh, and by the way, this isn’t half the stuff that I thought about that night back in 2014, only what I could keep up with as my mind took me on a wild goose chase as many sleepless nights did. This is the most unfortunate part of having insomnia stemming from early childhood anxiety and PTSD.

Sleep here I come for 10 minutes. Oh never mind baby is waking up. Fooled ya. Now you have to function safely on no sleep with 2 small children.

I’ve since been diagnosed with. ADHD, LD, severe anxiety, insomnia and PTSD. Having insomnia has many negative effects physically and mentally.

 If you read all that, congrats to you.  You are dedicated and don’t want to read that again I’m sure

Click Reference list to see more details about the dangers and risks of sleeping disorders.

Author: A.J Huff

AJ is a freelance writer who wants to assist others in stepping outside conventional therapy to calm the chaos within their minds. Since childhood, she has had a passion for the human mind. Although she has no fancy degree in psychology or neuroscience, she is hellbent on sharing the importance of keeping a healthy mind and how to achieve all goals when it comes to mental health. AJ is driven to awaken the calm soul within the mind. She no longer wants you to look at the hard times that happen in life the same way again. AJ has supported several people in their emotional healing process through the art of self-forgiveness, the forgiveness of others and stepping outside the comfort zone of everyday thinking into the calm reality you can have in life. It can and will happen, but it takes wholehearted practice and dedication to oneself. AJ believes we all need therapeutic doses of love, respect, compassion, and forgiveness for the sake of living happy, healthy, chaos-free lives. Come join AJ in this revolutionary emotional healthcare movement.

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